Dear Faithmate Advisors,
My girlfriends and guys I know have different opinions on this so I want you to please set the record straight. When you go on a first date (assuming the man is paying) should you order something really inexpensive or whatever you want, regardless of price. I have even heard that you SHOULD choose one of the most expensive things to see how he reacts. Is there a code of first date ethics or something for this?
As a Christian, what would you do and why?
The Real World Perspective
Faithmate’s Ethics Advisor says…
While there is not a concrete code of ethics, I suggest you follow two general guidelines: First, ask what he’s having and follow his lead. For example, if he orders the surf-‘n’-turf, you know you’re good to go on any item (as well as a soup and salad, if you so choose). However, if he sticks to a modest entrée—or orders just an appetizer—you might consider being more price conscious (although I don’t believe you must stick to exactly the same type of item as him). Secondly, if you happen to know that money is tight, I also advise not ordering over-the-top, out of consideration; this doesn’t, however, mean that if you think he’s well off, you must order everything on the menu!
Finally, in absence of these indicators—like when you are forced to order first and/or you know nothing about his financial situation—go middle of the road. If you simply order what you like, without going overboard, you’ll enjoy the meal more and therefore be a more pleasant dinner date.
The Real WORD Perspective
Faithmate’s Spiritual Advisor says…
Ezra 7:17 17Use the money carefully to buy the best bulls, rams, lambs, grain, and wine. Then sacrifice them on the altar at God’s temple in Jerusalem.
Of course, these are just two opinions! As a Christian, do you agree or disagree? Post your comments below…
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3 Comments So Far
I agree, one hundred percent. Simply, because I don’t care to go on a date if in fact I can’t afford to do so.
I would much rather spend a quiet evening among friends and family, or perhaps a homecooked meal.
Out of consideration, I would agree that a middle of the road entree is suitable, or following suit with the guy if he orders first. I think it’s inconsiderate & selfish to order something expensive just to see the reaction of the date. I know someone who orders 2 of the most expensive entrees on first dates. If I was the guy, I would think that person was very shallow & selfish, even if I could afford to buy the whole menu. On a first date, that would tell me, “this person believes in wasting money.” And if I was well-off, I still wouldn’t want a selfish, inconsiderate person wasting my money. Like the Bible says, “Let your moderation be known to all men.” To me, what I eat would be secondary to finding out who this person on the other side of the table is. If it’s someone I want to keep dating, and I make a good impression, there will be other chances to “order whatever you want.” Why treat it like the last supper, like you won’t ever get a chance to eat what you want ever again in your life — with that person, someone else or alone? Big deal. I think the priorities are in the wrong place for people who think like that.
SHOULD YOU CANCELLED YOUR ACCOUNT WITH FAITHMATE AS SOON AS SOMEONE STARTED SHOW INTEREST IN YOU.