How should you answer a personal question in front of people you don’t know?

Dear Faithmate Ethics Advisor,

I was at a get together with friends of a guy I have been seeing, and the wife of one of his friends started asking me if I have children and whether I see them often.  Probably stupidly, I was honest and said that my 19-year-old son was in jail.  Then, the woman asked me why!  I wasn’t about to discuss my son’s situation in front of people I don’t know.  Was she being inappropriate by asking?

As a Christian, what would you do and why?

Faithmate’s Ethics Advisor says…

When you find yourself in a situation such as this, the best responses are general ones like, “I see my son somewhat frequently, but not as often as I’d like.”  You are not obligated to disclose any more detail.  In your situation, once you had made the initial disclosure, you might have handled the follow-up inquiry as such: “His situation is somewhat complicated to explain.”  Anyone with any degree of social skill would quit their questioning after that.

So to answer your question specifically, the woman was inappropriately prying, but you were also sending conflicting signals by disclosing his whereabouts in the first place.  Remember also, in defense of human decency, people sometimes ask personal questions in an effort to form a bond, not necessarily intending to impolitely pry.

Of course, this is just one opinion!  As a Christian, do you agree or disagree?  Post your comments below…