What should you do as the sober driver stuck with the expenses?

June 29, 2009 Ethics Advisor
What should you do as the sober driver stuck with the expenses?

Dear Faithmate Ethics Advisor,

I am a 24-year-old woman and, unlike most of my friends, I do not drink.  I just don’t like the taste, and I don’t like being out of control or doing things that I might regret.  The problem is that, because of this, I am ALWAYS the driver when we go out on weekends.  I have a car, so I don’t mind that much, but my two friends rarely offer me gas money or money for parking.  How can I let them know this isn’t fair without sounding cheap?

As a Christian, what would you do and why?


Faithmate’s Ethics Advisor says…

You have a very valid point, and your friends need to know they are taking advantage of you.  While it’s great they have a sober driver, if anything, they should be picking up most of the evenings’ expenses in exchange for the free rides!  I suggest that the next time you are all together (when they are not drinking), you broach the subject by saying something like, “You girls know I am happy to get you around safely; however, it makes me feel taken advantage of when you don’t offer to pick up expenses like gas and parking.  I’m sure you are not doing it intentionally; you just probably don’t realize it’s a financial burden on me.  Since I value our friendship, I have to say something, so I don’t build resentment.  Does this make sense?”  When stated like this, there is no reason for them to be defensive.  If they are, you might think about making new friends…and possibly partaking in activities that don’t revolve around alcohol.

Of course, this is just one opinion!  As a Christian, do you agree or disagree?  Post your comments below…

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